Inner Beauty vs Outer Beauty (With Table)

New York Times best-selling author Mandy Hale famously said, “Outer beauty pleases the eye. Inner beauty captivates the heart.”

Meanwhile, inner beauty is defined loosely as "being a generally good person" in Urban Dictionary with 87% agreeing.

Inner Beauty vs Outer Beauty

Inner beauty is the beauty that you can’t see while outer beauty is what everyone sees when they look at you. It is the beauty on the outside that people notice first compared to the beauty of your soul and heart

Below is a comparison table of inner beauty vs outer beauty.

Comparison Inner Beauty  Outer Beauty
Visibility Only felt during interactions and takes time Visible upon 1st impressions
With Time Opportunities to grow and evolve  Visible signs of ageing
Possible Improvements Through mindset and purpose in life Through embracing graceful ageing, and smiling through life

1. Outer Beauty is visible on 1st sight, Inner Beauty is felt during interactions

Outer beauty creates initial attraction, inner beauty generates long-lasting affection.

We live in a dating world that places more emphasis on physical beauty than appreciation for beauty. After all, the first thing we assess on a dating app is the person’s outward presentation before we even read their bio, if they bothered to write anything at all. 

We all have ‘types’ we tend to go for – physical traits that appeal to us. Yet, if you’ve ever spoken to someone happily married, and/or someone head over heels in love with someone, it’s not the physical traits we hear about first, but rather about their gentle, loving personalities, their acts of service, and their quirks that make their partners smile.  

Love expert Matthew Hussey says connection, commitment, and compatibility are all pre-requisites to a long-lasting relationship. That might be the inner beauty that outer beauty cannot provide.

On one particular girls’ night out, a friend of mine couldn’t seem to stop gushing about this new man of hers. She spoke about how for the first time, she felt calm and peaceful in a relationship. 

Another lady I’ve had the pleasure of speaking to was swooning at the mention of her husband. She shared she knew he was ‘The One’ after only a few dates, but kept that to herself, thinking it was only a honeymoon stage.

That feeling never left her, and he apparently felt the same way. The man proposed after 1 year, and they’ve gone on to be married for 10 happy years and are proud parents to 2 kids. They’ve always been supportive partners, she said, and have always given each other space to be themselves. The one thought she wanted to leave me with was: “Marriage isn’t as hard as people make it out to sound if you marry the right person.” 

Everything from that fateful encounter stayed with me since – The way her tone softened and her eyes twinkled with glee whilst talking about the love of her life. That must be how true love feels. 

When we meet someone new, it’s easy to focus on the physical attributes. We look at the way he or she dresses, how he or she carries themselves, and whether or not he or she seems like a nice person. However, once we’ve spent some time with someone, we start to see beyond the surface level. We start to understand the person’s personality, values, and beliefs.

This process of learning a person's inner beauty happens slowly, but eventually, we come to appreciate the things about our partner that we never noticed before. This appreciation becomes even stronger when we find out that those same traits exist in other people too.

The longer you're around someone, the more you'll learn about him or her. You'll discover the good and the bad, and you'll start to appreciate the positive aspects of each person.

Physical features are what we notice initially, but inner qualities are the ones we remember most.

2. Outer beauty get worse due to ageing, inner beauty can be cultivated.

Outer beauty does not improve even if you spent hours and money on it because the effect of ageing cannot be prevented even with good skin care routine or surgery.

Inner beauty does not worsen over time and usually get better in the right condition. Some people does get more antsy or naggy with the same person or as they get older. However, it can be cultivated with the right condition unlike outer beauty. 

When we think about inner beauty, many people immediately think of their personality and character traits. This is true; however, we also need to look at our appearance because even though we may think we look fine, others might disagree.

You shouldn't judge someone based on his/her appearance because it's very difficult to know someone without knowing him/her. In the same way, you should not let someone judge your beauty based on your looks.

Do not compare yourself with anyone else. Everyone has his/her own unique personality and looks. So, do not compare yourself with anyone. 

3. Outer beauty can be improved for short-term, inner beauty can be cultivated

Some people think that outer beauty is completely random. They believe that you could look like a movie star one day and then wake up looking like a hobo the next without proper care. Inner beauty, however, is largely within our control. You can choose what to wear, how to groom yourself, and how to treat others.

A great way to improve your overall appearance is to be nicer to others. If you smile at someone, compliment them, or help them out, you'll make them feel better about themselves. This makes them want to be around you and helps build trust.

We can learn new skills and grow ourselves without having to spend any money. There are many free online courses and apps that teach us new things every single day.

Inner beauty depends on your character and some of it can be cultivated through a change in your mindset. Some practiced mindfulness and meditation to cultivate their mindset to be present in the moment with an open mind and heart and non-judgmental.

Outer beauty changes over time, inner beauty is eternal.

Your lover's outer beauty fades over time, while his or her inner qualities remain forever.

The best way to improve your inner appearance is to be nice to everyone. When you do nice things for other people, you'll start feeling better about yourself. And when you feel good about yourself, you'll start acting better towards others.

You don't have to be rich to be generous. Even volunteering at a soup kitchen, donating clothes to charity, or mentoring kids can bring you joy.

Inner beauty is something we carry within us. We are born with it, and it doesn't go away. In fact, it gets better with age. Our outer appearance changes, but our inner beauty stays the same. If we're lucky, people notice it and appreciate it. But sometimes, we don't see ourselves clearly enough to realize how beautiful we really are.

In conclusion, it doesn't matter how great your friends say you are, whether your partner loves you, or how much money your parents give you...the only person who really knows how beautiful you are is you. And only you can truly appreciate your own inner beauty.

What do you think about outer beauty? Do you believe it matters more than inner beauty? Let us know in the comments section below.


 


Efforts have been made to get the information as accurate and updated as possible. If you found any incorrect information with credible source, please send it via the contact us form

Deborah Choo
Deborah Choo loves discussing relationships, platonic or not, as that remains at the heart of human existence. She draws upon learnings from couples’ counselling, and continues to celebrate an incredible journey of growth.


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